Dogs know best that running around in circles is an easy way to get your mind off anything...and get extremely dizzy. Well today while I was taking my turn I wasnt running in circles I was running in squares. Let me tell you, it took me a minute to recover from that what...its pretty dizzying too.
Not only that but my mind was literally only on the next turn I needed to take. Running in small squares was even harder. You can never seem to turn in the right place so it usually ends up being a circle your running in. Quite frankly it seemed hopeless to me. H-O-P-E-L-E-S-S-!-!-! I think you get it. It just discourages me that dogs can be so much more apt to running in any sort of shape than humans. Well now you know never to try running in circles, it is not an enjoyable task.
A toast to the dogs!
AC
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Drive a Tank Into a Movie Theater
This has been embarrassing. I drove a toy tank into the best movie theater in town.
Before I actually completed the mission I wanted to get some feedback from a worker first. A young woman whom I sorta recognized was the only one standing at the popcorn counter when I walked in. I had really wanted two people in there when I drove the tank in so that I could talk to one of them about what I was about to do and hear how they think they would react. The second person would have no idea. A real surprised reaction. Then I could compare the two. I asked the girl if anyone else was working and she pointed me in the direction of the box office. I told the slightly elderly woman in the box office what I was planning on doing and asked her how she would react.
"I'd just tell you not to shoot anything with that little gun on top." She said. I thanked her after she wished me good luck in there, took a deep breath and opened the door to the movie theater.
Kneeling on the ground, I pushed the tank into the theater and drove it up to the counter, sound effects and all. Then I looked up. The girl had an amused looking smile on her face and asked me in a confused voice what I was doing. "Driving a tank into the movie theater." I replied.
"Nice." She said. Nice? How is that nice? Silly, I can see. Weird, even. But nice?
Well, she was that kind of person who says stuff like that, so I didn't give her a hard time.
Of course she asked why, and I told her what I was doing. "Well, I better go write about it." I said, after she clearly was done with me. The few steps I walked out of the theater felt like so many more. At least the woman in the box office congratulated me and wished me good luck on the rest of our list.
Before I actually completed the mission I wanted to get some feedback from a worker first. A young woman whom I sorta recognized was the only one standing at the popcorn counter when I walked in. I had really wanted two people in there when I drove the tank in so that I could talk to one of them about what I was about to do and hear how they think they would react. The second person would have no idea. A real surprised reaction. Then I could compare the two. I asked the girl if anyone else was working and she pointed me in the direction of the box office. I told the slightly elderly woman in the box office what I was planning on doing and asked her how she would react.
"I'd just tell you not to shoot anything with that little gun on top." She said. I thanked her after she wished me good luck in there, took a deep breath and opened the door to the movie theater.
Kneeling on the ground, I pushed the tank into the theater and drove it up to the counter, sound effects and all. Then I looked up. The girl had an amused looking smile on her face and asked me in a confused voice what I was doing. "Driving a tank into the movie theater." I replied.
"Nice." She said. Nice? How is that nice? Silly, I can see. Weird, even. But nice?
Well, she was that kind of person who says stuff like that, so I didn't give her a hard time.
Of course she asked why, and I told her what I was doing. "Well, I better go write about it." I said, after she clearly was done with me. The few steps I walked out of the theater felt like so many more. At least the woman in the box office congratulated me and wished me good luck on the rest of our list.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Dial-a-prayer and tell them they're wrong
Me- AC, what's the phone number for dial-a-prayer?
AC- Uhh, let me look it up. It's 1-800-4HEAVEN.
Me- Thanks.
I dial and get this buzzing excited feeling when it starts to ring.
Then an answering service picks up for this "divine" something-or-other company. I hang on for a minute just to make sure it was the wrong thing.
Okay, don't freak out, I tell myself.
Me- AC? That was the wrong number.
AC- I just found that out to, sorry.
Me- That's okay. I'll look it up this time.
How often do you want to just bow down and worship google?
Jiminy. It saves me every time. It lifts me up when I have fallen. It comforts me when I am sad. Need I say more?
Well, this time I'm prepared for failure or jackpot when I hear the familiar buzzing ring. Then....
A voice. Calling me friend. Telling me they are glad I called dial-a-prayer. I wait breathlessly as the voice goes on.
And on. Ohhhhh. I have come to a realization. As this voice is scripting from the book of Job, comforting me, and expressing it's sympathy, I feel anguished that no real person has picked up! What if I had an urgent prayer? What if I really did need to tell them they were wrong? How in the heck could I tell them?! They made me feel worse than I did to start with. What. A. Bummer. Allors, mes amis, I would advice NOT to dial-a-prayer when you need one, because, rest assured, you ain't getting one.
AC- Uhh, let me look it up. It's 1-800-4HEAVEN.
Me- Thanks.
I dial and get this buzzing excited feeling when it starts to ring.
Then an answering service picks up for this "divine" something-or-other company. I hang on for a minute just to make sure it was the wrong thing.
Okay, don't freak out, I tell myself.
Me- AC? That was the wrong number.
AC- I just found that out to, sorry.
Me- That's okay. I'll look it up this time.
How often do you want to just bow down and worship google?
Jiminy. It saves me every time. It lifts me up when I have fallen. It comforts me when I am sad. Need I say more?
Well, this time I'm prepared for failure or jackpot when I hear the familiar buzzing ring. Then....
A voice. Calling me friend. Telling me they are glad I called dial-a-prayer. I wait breathlessly as the voice goes on.
And on. Ohhhhh. I have come to a realization. As this voice is scripting from the book of Job, comforting me, and expressing it's sympathy, I feel anguished that no real person has picked up! What if I had an urgent prayer? What if I really did need to tell them they were wrong? How in the heck could I tell them?! They made me feel worse than I did to start with. What. A. Bummer. Allors, mes amis, I would advice NOT to dial-a-prayer when you need one, because, rest assured, you ain't getting one.
DIAL-A-PRAYER
Apparently I am completely inadequate of Dialing A Prayer. Which surprises me...who knew it would take a genius? Upon trying three numbers I came up with zero results whatsoever. First I did the obvious...DIALAPRAYER which is actually 3-425-277-2937 in numbers. But this is Craig's Phone Number...so don't call it =) Interesting man...our conversation went like this:
Craig- Hi this is Craig
AC- Hello, is this Dial A Prayer?
Craig- Ha...no, I think you have the wrong number
AC- Oh I am so sorry...
THE END!!!
Then I called 1-800-4HE-AVEN which is actually not Heaven at all, but the Divine Design retail number...whoopsie! So if you are interested go to www.divinedesign.com or thats what they said to do :0
And the final number that I called is no longer in service according to the cute Verizon girl's recording.
So *shrug of shoulders* I guess dial a prayer doesn't exist, and if anyone knows of an in service prayer hot line I would be happy to hear from you!
Well Happy Prayer Dialing for Now!
Always
AC
OOOH!!! It worked, I dialed a prayer! I didnt think it was possible...well boy I figured out a number that worked for reals :) Haha and wowser that is a nice experience...its a recording and it friggin cracked me up!Here is the number...812-473-PRAY Ha well...I dont exactly know what to say to that...ummm how about
In Jesus' Name We Pray
Amen
Craig- Hi this is Craig
AC- Hello, is this Dial A Prayer?
Craig- Ha...no, I think you have the wrong number
AC- Oh I am so sorry...
THE END!!!
Then I called 1-800-4HE-AVEN which is actually not Heaven at all, but the Divine Design retail number...whoopsie! So if you are interested go to www.divinedesign.com or thats what they said to do :0
And the final number that I called is no longer in service according to the cute Verizon girl's recording.
So *shrug of shoulders* I guess dial a prayer doesn't exist, and if anyone knows of an in service prayer hot line I would be happy to hear from you!
Well Happy Prayer Dialing for Now!
Always
AC
OOOH!!! It worked, I dialed a prayer! I didnt think it was possible...well boy I figured out a number that worked for reals :) Haha and wowser that is a nice experience...its a recording and it friggin cracked me up!Here is the number...812-473-PRAY Ha well...I dont exactly know what to say to that...ummm how about
In Jesus' Name We Pray
Amen
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